'Full of roguery and carefree' - Darren Whelan's father tells funeral mass

“IF Darren could come and talk to us today, I think what he would say this: Don’t let my tragic death destroy your life. Don’t torture yourself.”

With these words, Fr Richie Davoren strove to console the family and friends of Darren Whelan, the 23-year-old who lost his life following a tragic accident in Greece. Darren was on holiday with friends before taking up his first job as a civil engineer. 

Speaking at Darren’s funeral Mass this Monday in Kildimo, Fr Davoren said: “The cruel reality of this most unfair and sudden end to Darren’s life is not  to be clouded over or smoke-screened… with pious platitudes. Darren is gone from this world and that cruel, cruel reality is what your hearts and  minds are trying to process.””

Addressing Darren’s very many young friends and relations, he continued: “You should not have to experience this, so young in your life. But learn from it. Learn about the fragility, the preciousness of the gift of life which none of us spend too much thinking about in our early 20s. Learn from this awful sadness and let it form how you approach your life.” 

Darren, he continued, was by nature, an extrovert. “He came alive in company. He enjoyed people when they were at their best because that was what brought out the best in him.”

Earlier, the symbols brought to the altar were a celebration of Darren’s life and interests: a ball for his love of sport; a hard hat in recognition of his hard work and achievements; toothpaste to remind people of his infectious smile; and “all the rooms he lit up”; keys to signify the many adventures Darren enjoyed; and a Guinness glass for “all the good times gone by”. 

Fr Davoren spoke too about the two friends, Brian O’Mahony and Willie O’Meara who were on holiday with him but unable to attend the funeral because of self-isolation. It was one of the bitter ironies that Darren booked a one-way ticket to Greece, he said. “His plan was to extend the holiday as long as possible,” he said, “But it was a one-way ticket to somewhere else.”

Darren’s dad, Eddie, also thanked the two young men and wished them well in their lives to come, adding his hope that they would be able to move on from the incident. 

“What a character he was,” he said of his son. “He had a massive personality, a huge smile, full of roguery and carefree.” He described Darren as thoughtful, someone who always gave 100% and someone who had friends everywhere. 

“We were blessed. We loved every second of every minute with you Darren. Take care,” he said in farewell. 

Earlier, in one of the most heart-breaking  journeys they will ever make, twenty four friends walked alongside Darren’s coffin from his Kildimo home to the local church.  Along the main street in Kildimo, Darren’s friends and colleagues from Kildimo/Pallaskenry GAA Club formed a guard of honour in farewell while neighbours and family friends also stood in sad solidarity. 

Kildimo Pallaskenry parish priest Fr John Donworth, who led the concelebrated Mass alongside Fr Davoren and Fr Ed Austen of Loughill,  welcomed the funeral cortege into the  church saying: “There is great sadness in the heart of all those who loved and knew Darren.”

“I am sure it was a big shock for his own age group,” he added. “Sadly life can be very fragile as this incident show. If it has shaken you to the core, don’t keep it to yourself. Share it with others.”

Following Requiem Mass, Darren’s remains were brought to his dad’s home place of Loughill where he was buried. 

Darren is survived by Eddie, by his mother  Geraldine, brothers Eamon and Gavin, his grandmother Peg Carmody, aunts, uncles, other relations and many, many friends.

A GoFundMe campaign in Darren's memory has raised almost €60,000 for the Kevin Bell Repatriation Society, which helped the family.