Funeral traditions which have survived millennia are now on hold

THE Irish wake, a cultural tradition that has survived thousands of years, has had to be foresaken due to the spread of the coronavirus.

Restrictions on gatherings and advice from the government have meant that the traditional ‘Irish goodbye’ of large crowds and community support has been put on hold.

This has left families in the position where they can not say goodbye in a way they may have once imagined. This is a situation that is likely to worsen over the coming weeks and months, with Italy banning funerals full stop due to the virus, robbing families of the chance to say a final goodbye.

John-Mark Griffin, of Griffin's Funerals in John's Gate, has seen the effect the coronavirus has had on funerals firsthand.

“The Covid-19 virus has seriously impacted on the way the traditional funeral is carried out. It has also been a very difficult time for our own family as we've had our own family bereavement this week, so we have felt like we've been at both sides of the situation, as the funeral director and as a mourning family member,” said Mr Griffin.

“As a funeral director, we have seen first hand that it has been very difficult for everyone. Families in Limerick have, traditionally, had a massive and important culture of a certain style of funeral and that's being seriously curtailed by the restrictions, obviously, which are all very understandable.”

A funeral is always a time of loss, but these restrictions are adding to the stress a family may feel.

“So although the restrictions are very understandable, it can be difficult for families who often lean on the community for support and during the mourning time. This can make it more difficult than normal. We would have found the same thing as a bereaved family.  Because we have had to hold a different type of private service. But we made the best of the situation, it was very personal and lovely in it’s own way.

“We found that the ways we suggested to the general public of how to sympathize with the family, through email, phone-in condolences and on-line with rip.ie that, although they weren't the same thing, that they were still quite comforting.”

The Irish Association of Funeral Directors, last Friday, released a statement advising that funerals be held behind closed doors and that no public advertisement of the funeral be released.

“Guidance form Health Service Executive (HSE) advises that funerals can be held privately behind closed doors with family and close friends can be present. There should be no public advertisement of funeral arrangements – in print or online – but death notices can be placed without arrangements. Families can advise friends and relations privately of funeral arrangements,” they said in a statement.

“There should be no provision for condolence book and pen at the funeral and public reposing must be discouraged as should funeral home gatherings. Family gatherings should be by invite only and attendance restricted to below 100. Social distancing must be maintained with no handshaking or hugging. Mourners can express their condolence online at www.rip.ie and send condolence or Mass cards by post,” they added.

Mr Griffin says although he agrees with the measures, it doesn't make it easier on the families.

“We've been strongly advised by the Irish Association of Funeral Directors and the HSE in relation to gatherings and crowds. These are ongoing and changing guidelines, and as we saw with our Taoiseach's excellent delivery just this (Tuesday) evening, things will get worse before they recover.

“I think everyone is in agreement that the restrictions are genuinely needed, but it doesn't make it any easier for be bereaved families at their already sad time. The concept of the large memorial service that has been put on hold and I probably would feel that, based on our own bereavement, that the Memorial service at a future date is something that we will look forward to as a family. Where family and friends can gather and remember their loved one.”