The Traitors Ireland’s contestant Vanessa Ogbonna: “Three women argue and it’s judged unfairly”

Reality TV is built on conflict, but how that conflict is perceived often depends on who’s doing the arguing. That was the key point made by The Traitors Ireland contestant Vanessa Ogbonna in a candid interview with Dermot Whelan, standing in for Oliver Callan on RTÉ Radio one’s morning show.

Reflecting on her time around the roundtable, Vanessa acknowledged that her onscreen clashes didn’t always look flattering. But she stressed that her intentions were never malicious.

“It was highly stressful, but I was not disrespectful,” she explained. “Everything was gameplay, nothing was personal, nothing was about the people. It was about what we believed was said and trying to clear my own name in the process.”

Yet when Dermot replayed one of those fiery moments, both he and Vanessa pointed to something deeper at play, how conflict is perceived differently depending on gender.

“I think you touched on something important there, because it’s how we perceive arguments between men and women,” Dermot observed. “If it was three lads sitting around that table tearing lumps out of each other, people would say, ‘oh yeah, look at them, alpha males sticking up for themselves.’ But if it’s three women, suddenly it’s, ‘ah lads, why are ye being so catty?’”

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Vanessa agreed, adding that this wasn’t a hypothetical example. “It literally happened with Paudie, it happened with Eamon, it happened with Ben, it happened with Nick just episodes earlier. But the reaction wasn’t the same.”

Her reflections underline a double standard familiar far beyond television one where Male contestants raising their voices can be framed as strong, assertive or tactical whereas women doing the same are often painted as catty, emotional or combative.